How To Stop Giving Up On Your Goals

Quitter’s Day.

It’s the second Friday of January and it’s called that because that’s the day most people give up on their New Year’s resolutions.

You probably know someone like this or maybe you yourself have done this.

Most likely this happens with other goals too and not just your New Year’s resolutions.

While there isn’t a singular cause for why people give on their goals there is a common factor I’ve noticed.

People who overshare their goals with others are more likely to give up on them.

This isn’t just a hunch, there’s science to back this up too.

There’s a phenomenon known as the Social Reality Effect where when you talk about your goals too much you experience an amount of dopamine similar to accomplishing that goal.

This makes you feel less motivated to do the hard work to accomplish your goal since you’ve already experienced that dopamine hit.

You’re essentially giving yourself the reward before doing the work.

So what’s the solution? There’s two parts to it:

The first part is easy in theory since it literally requires you to do nothing but to stop oversharing your goals.

If you’re generally more social then it may be a bit hard to get used to.

Don’t worry though, just knowing about this effect will make you more conscious about it and less likely to do it.

If you’re tempted then just ask yourself if sharing is worth jeopardizing your goals.

This second part is optional.

So far you may think this isn’t realistic.

How can I stay secretive about what I’m working on forever?

The answer is you don’t have to.

The key is to share the milestones you’ve already accomplished and not what you want to accomplish.

Let’s say your goal is to lose 20 pounds. 

Instead of telling everyone your goal, focus on putting the effort into improving your diet and exercising consistently.

You put in the hard work and then you lose 10 pounds. 

Now this you can share since it’s a milestone you’ve accomplished towards your goal.

Remember to let yourself experience the dopamine reward after doing the work and not before.

So next time you have a goal keep it to yourself and share your progress after you put in the hard work.

That’s all I have to share for now.

Until next time, keep learning and never stop improving.

— Nadim